Dating? What's that?!
So a whole year ago, talking about dating was honestly to
me, kind of cringy. But then, I met the man of my dreams. We have only been
dating for 3 months but I can truly say I am in love. But again, definitely not
a professional when it comes to love.
Something I love that we talked about in class was
communication and how key it is to any and all relationships. Me and my
boyfriend have been so open and upfront with each other that I feel like we are
closer because of it. Before we started dating we had been on one date and
neither of us really had feelings for each other. But as we continued to spend
time together, he eventually asked to talk with me about the relationship and
where it was headed.
During our talk he said he liked me but didn’t want to be
exclusive yet. I was okay with that because the month previous, I had gotten out
of an unfortunate relationship with another man. But then every time we hung
out, he would bring up dating me and how unsure he was about it. that really
freaked me out, not going to lie. But the fact that he wasn’t leading me on or dangling
me from a string, he constantly communicated with me. It is so so wonderful to not
worry about what was going on in his brain. I just knew because he told me.
That is something I fear for the coming generations. I know
back then, people were a lot more clear with their feelings for those they cared
about. If someone liked another person, they would usually come right out and
say it. There was no real other form of communication. Sure they had letters
and the phone. But they didn’t have texting and couldn’t hide behind technology
to share their feelings. You just had to come right out and say it.
Kids these days are way too comfortable saying things over
text that we all know they would never share in person. It worries me because
then they wont ever share their feelings and will be glued to a screen. I'm hoping
that one day people will realize that face to face communication is way better
than over text.
Something else we talked about was the RAM model. My roommate
last semester was obsessed with the ram model! It pretty much is the key to
success in any relationship. Pretty much there are 5 pillars and each is different.
The first one is know, how well do you know this person. The next tier is trust
but you have to know the person more than you trust them. Then as you move down
the way, after trust is rely. How much do you rely on this person. Then when
you can trust and rely on this person it might be smart to commit. And after
all those steps are taken, then can physical touch be a thing.
Today people have relationships and dating so backwards. We cant
just go on a date to go to know someone. People just go straight for the lips,
and all the physical touch before even really knowing these people. Being physical
so early on without all the other necessary steps, everything else just gets
neglected. Don’t even get to know him, not even committing and reliance and
trust are somewhere in there.
It makes me so sad that people don’t really date because,
well, I have a boyfriend, but before then you have to go on dates! It can be
just for fun or it can be more seriously. I really enjoyed class and this topic
of dating. Way cool,
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